Following each Twins loss, we present you with something lovely, mirthful, or thought-provoking–something entirely unrelated to baseball. Consider the Glorious Nation your local watering-hole. Come here after a loss and drown your sorrows in nut-shots, animals dressed like people, etc. As the strikeouts speed by, blurring into one another, I enter a hypnotic trance, in [...]
Archive for June, 2011
The Palate Cleanser: Hypnosis
Posted in Palate Cleanser on June 23, 2011 | 7 Comments »
Coping with Last Place Depression
Posted in Official Proclamations on June 14, 2011 | 4 Comments »
Do you have problems feeling happy for days and months at a time? Do you not find joy in many of the activities you used to love- such as watching Twins games? Do you struggle with thoughts of suicide or murder on a regular basis? If you answered yes to any of these questions you [...]
A Completely Uncynical Celebration of a Sweep of the Royals
Posted in Uncategorized on June 5, 2011 | 4 Comments »
Today, the Twins completed a four-game sweep of the Royals, and I’m not even going to let myself be cynical about it. So what if it was against a pretty bad team? So what if the Twins are still in last place? So what if they’re still 12.5 GAMES out in the division? So what [...]